A Griever’s List of New Year’s Resolutions
H.E.A.L.
H- Honor your pain and your loss
E- Engage in the process of healing
A- Accept the changes that must occur
L- Learn to find joy in your life again
We have lost someone who played an irreplaceable role in our life. Someone who owned a significant piece of our heart. How do we begin to heal this kind of pain?
We can start by recognizing how very fortunate we were to have ever experienced this bond–this strong love. Some people never have the chance to experience such meaningful and life-changing love.
Remembering the love we no longer have, is painful and very difficult in the beginning of our grief. Eventually we must make a conscious effort to choose to remember our loved one with gratitude for the experiences we were given.
We can start to put the pieces of our broken heart back together by continuing to honor the love we shared with our love one. This love was a gift that we were blessed to have received. We must not take the gift for granted by only remembering the pain of our loss.
We must also inevitably accept that change is a part of life; it’s just a part that we hoped wouldn’t happen to us. Birth and death is happening all around us, every minute of every day.
Impermanence is the very definition of human existence.
Everything changes.
Resistance to the changes that we must allow in our life only allows our suffering to continue.
Cherish and honor the memories.
Recognize how blessed you were to experience this love.
Choose to eventually let the memories bring you more joy than pain.
Learn to allow joy into your life again.
Accept that life will be different now, but, the love we shared with our loved one will never be lost.
This love is always packed safely away in our heart. Sometimes we just need a reminder that it is there and always available to us.
Move on into 2016 knowing that your loved one is always with you and that you can heal your broken heart .
Blessings.
-Rhonda
