Archive April 7, 2014

I am missing my Chocolate Chip today. My little Chip man was so sweet and he came to live with me because his family was too busy to take care of him. He had a bad valve that couldn’t be replaced. First they didn’t have small enough valves for little dogs. After some time they did make the valves but small dogs don’t do well on heart lung machines. So we couldn’t have his heart fixed. But he did prove Vetmedin was a wonder medication for dogs with heart problems. Thanks to Vetmedin, fourisimide,and benazapyl… He lived five years with a bad heart, instead of one. I miss him though, a lot.

Coffee’s Cancer. By wendy

We sit and wait for tests and counts.
We sit and wait to see,
if white cells are high enough
To get chemo in me.

My family is here,
they won’t leave me alone.
They wait for my chemo too….
Maybe today the cancer, will be gone

Wendy stays right by my side
She tells me it’s OK
She gives me to the doctor
And tells me not to bite her today

The chemo makes me feel tired and sick
It takes the bounce out of me
I have to rest and eat little bites
Anything that tastes good, you see.

I hate the needles and the pokes
They make big bruises on my bunny feet
I just wish the cancer would go away
And life would again be sweet.

I was re-arranging today my attic room in the garage. I call it the loft. With some help of a friend, I went thru a lot of bins and have a pile to give away. The furniture is rearranged and think my plans were good. I double stacked the shelves, in front of each other. This system will be a pain but it will work the best. If the shelves were on wheels it would be easier. I put the desk by the window so I can have more light. (that would be David’s idea). My friend June said she would do the insulation but I still have to pay the electrician to upgrade the electric and I need venting and I can’t do that either. When I got the new estimate it was $5000 more than the first estimate so that was a big jump.

Now to figure out what to do. It would be a perfect art studio but I can’t pull money out of a hat. Wouldn’t that be nice…money out of the hat.

Planning is hard for me since the brain injury. I have to write everything down and make sure I follow the plan I wrote. If something interferes with what I am doing, it totally disrupts what I was thinking or planning. I hate that.

So I will make a few more idea notes and see if I can take a load to goodwill.

It’s week nine and nothing is every easy. We have an appointment tomorrow at 10:30 but my sister checked the weather and it’s suppose to be freezing rain. So I called our local clinic to see if Coffee could have chemo here. This week it’s a pill. UW Madison doesn’t do chemo on Fridays. Driving 200 miles in freezing rain doesn’t not sound appealing, but today it is a beautiful day! So I called and UW Madison, had the Oncology Unit call me back. I had a neurologist appointment at 11, the cancer unit said they would take me anytime I could come. So we went right after the neurology appointment. Usually we are prepared, breakfast and lunch prepacked, drinks and paperwork. But we went just started driving. Hi way here we come.

Chemo today was good and fast. Blood count today was 2000. So she got her chemo pill. We had a little trouble getting the pill down her, but a little liver sausage goes a long way. Glands are normal size, cancer still in total remission. They adjusted this chemo because it took her blood count really low last time she had it.

On the way home David called, he’s on his way to the emergency room. He fell and popped his knee, so who knows what I will find when I get home.

Sometimes the weathers nice …sometimes it’s not. Sometimes it’s cold…..up north it’s getting 10 inches of snow……so …..welcome to Wisconsin weather. You never get bored because the weather is never the same 2 days in a row.

So I have been making plan spring plans. It will show up sooner or later. I don’t know if I can afford the remodeling of the garage room into my art studio. So I am making plans to finish the school items I want to give away and the items I want to keep for awhile. The other thing is rearranging all the shelves and the furniture. So I have been making plans to rearrange the furniture and make it a more workable area with more airflow. When I first built the room it was just for storage. So I had shelves in the middle of the room but because there is only one window (my mistake, I thought it would be more secure that way) that means the shelves block the light and air. So shelves getting moved! The only really bad thing is the room is a triangle so the middle of the room is the only tall part. On the sides, it gets smaller and smaller.

My things will be sorted and given away by spring.

The surreal flowers of door county

My very favorite April Fools dinner, cupcake that are not really cupcakes but are actually meal loafs baked in cupcake pans then taken out put in cupcake papers and then frosted? Yes…. frosted with colored mash potatoes and pea decorations! I loved making them.

These are from the Internet, my potatoes were never this fancy.

Weather in Wisconsin……is crazy and this years was really crazy. Three polar vortexes that keeps us in minus 65 degree weather this winter and played havoc an all sorts of things….well today it was 60. And while it won’t last long and it’s will only be here for a little while….I wore a sling jacket and did two walks. One with a friend after acupuncture, and one with the dogs.

It was so nice and on our walk David pointed out the buds on the lilac bush AND the 3 inch sprouts on the bulbs at the corner house. Wow spring is actually on it way even though the rest of the week, cold, snowy and rainy. When I was very depressed after being assaulted, David would say “you have to stop this, you have start appreciating the things around you again like the flowers, birds and sunsets.” I thought he was crazy but he wasn’t. I was letting the world go by just like Bella after Edward left her in the second Twilight movie, and the world spinned around her…she was so detached. That’s how I felt,… and to survive I detached from everything…..and the world spinned around me….
I didn’t mind the polar vortexes this year, once you get used to the cold and your body adjusts, it’s not that bad, but I am starting to notice and appreciate things again. I want to be less isolated and more in time with the world. I missed it.

I have to learn how to make this

Look at the carnation!

These are my little girls. Creamy and Coffee. They are my life. I love them. I rescued them from a shelter who rescued them from a puppy mill. I never realized how much they would grow and change. Coffee was about 8 weeks old when I got her. Creamy was 5 and a breeder dog for the puppy mill. Coffee doesn’t remember it there but Creamy she has grown and changed so much! She is OCD. she must have a pattern and repetition makes her feel safe but she has learned so many things about the outside world and life.

Bonnie said that she only adopts adult puppy mill dogs out to family with fenced in yards. If they escape they are so afraid of the outside world they will find a hiding place where they feel safe and starve there. They will not seek out food and water. I though if Creamy discovered the sun, grass, sky, and yard if she lived her life there I would be happy for her. But she wanted to do more. My vet said she would learn more from the other dogs than she would from me. My little Chocolate Chip taught her a lot and she leaned a lot from watching Coffee grow and learn new things. Well she decided she wanted to try to go on walks. At first she lived on the back of my legs now she’s at the end of the leash ” checking it out” she loves the yard and loves going in the van! Barking all the time but oh doesn’t she love going….going….going! She has a booster seat in the car so she can see everything and her favorite thing is cruising altitude. 50 mph or over. She loves beds, and pillows and treats, she knew none of it and she thought pillows were freaky but now she loves them watching her grow and change and learn has been a wonderful learning experience for me. We are learning together.

Creamy, Me and Coffee